Jack and the Turkey
by McVitie
Summary: Jack meets the Thanksgiving Turkey, completely by accident. Pure crack and is not intended to make sense :)


This is pure crack and if you take this seriously I will wonder what you're on xD

For Julchen.

* * *

Jack Frost was grinning like a silly hen as he flew into the town of Burgess. Jamie and Sophie would be pleased to see him, as he hadn't been in town for at least a week and a half. He had been all around the world, conjuring up hailstorms and blizzards. Jack sniffed in the cold night air, breathing a sigh of relief. It was so good to be back here.

It was only a few quick minutes before he was on Jamie's roof. His presence had already brought the snow clouds rolling in, and the adults below were looking up and groaning. Jack grinned mischievously, swinging down onto Jamie's windowsill.

"Hey Ja-" Jack began to say, but was cut off by his own surprise as he realised he couldn't hear his own voice. He gathered up the frost-coated edges of his sleeves, jamming them into his ears to quieten the racket.

It didn't really help that much, but from what he could tell, it was loud rock music. Probably from the 1970's, but Jack wasn't really sure and he didn't care.

"_**Jamie!**_" Jack yelled, pulling his window open and leaping inside.

"Ja-? Ugh, damn curtains..." he muttered, pushing the heavy piece of fabric out of his face. Once inside Jamie's room he was met with possibly the weirdest sight he'd ever seen in all his 300 years of living, and he'd seen some pretty weird stuff.

Jamie's radio was on full blast, playing some old Queen song, and in the center of the room was Jamie, rocking out and dancing in his pink boxers like there was nobody watching. And as far as he knew, nobody was watching. It wasn't like he could see Jack, what with the _massive rubber turkey he was wearing on his head._ Jack began laughing so hard that he overpowered the music. Jamie stopped the track suddenly and began staring at him. At least, he assumed he was being stared at. It was rather hard to tell with the _massive rubber turkey that he was wearing on his head._

Seriously, it was the size of a large basketball.

Jack shook himself, wiping away his tears of laughter. He stood up, and pulled the turkey off Jamie's head, tucking it under one arm.

"Jamie, what the hell?" Jack chuckled, "Did Sandy slip some kind of drug into his dream sand?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. Jack marvelled at Jamie's ability to keep a totally straight face.

"I'm sorry Jack, I-" Jamie said robotically. Jack stared.

"What?" he laughed, cutting him off. "Jamie, why are you saying sorry?" Jamie's stare was beginning to penetrate into Jack's soul now and it was beginning to freak him out.

"Jack, I am-" Jamie began.

"Stop saying you're sorry Jamie, it's ok. We all have our moments of craziness!" Jack said, beginning to giggle again.

"JACK." Jamie yelled. His face remained emotionless. Jack was slightly terrified now. "I have a secret Jack." Jamie whispered, his lips curling up in the tiniest of smirks.

"What is it?" he said, bending down to Jamie's level, smirking a little. He was trying to take this seriously. Not like it was easy, with Jamie's pink flower-patterned boxer shorts and the knee-high striped stockings he was wearing.

"I am secretly the-"

"Pffft!" Jack snorted. "What are you, the Thanksgiving Turkey in disguise or something? Because that sure would explain-"

"Yes." Jamie said, still keeping that pokerface.

"What?" Jack cried, collapsing to the floor in a fit of laughter. "It's not April Fools day for a while yet Jamie!" he managed to get out, in between fits of roaring laughter.

"Do you want me to prove this?" Jamie asked, grabbing the turkey head and pulling it on.

"Yeah ri- AAAAAAARRGHHH!" Jack yelled.

Jamie flapped his arms twice like a turkey, wiggled his butt three times, and them span around in a circle, hopping and making pecking motions. With each pecking motion, his spinning gre faster and faster until there was a mighty BANG and Jamie was gone.

"Jamie?" Jack asked cautiously, a grin still on his lips. "Where are-"

"LOOK BEHIND YOU JACK." a weird voice screeched from behind him.

"Wh- **AAAAAAAAAGGHHHHHHH!**" Jack screamed, vaulting out the window, closely followed by none other than the Turkey himself, who was flailing his beak and snapping at Jack's butt.

"TURKEY WILL GOBBLE UP THE JACKIE. YES HE WILL!" the Turkey screeched manically. "JACK WILL LOOK GOOD AS A COAT, YES HE WILL! YOU'LL BE A TASTY JACK!"

Jack just screamed like a two year old girl and kept running.

* * *

_A few days later, at the North Pole_

"Do you want to talk about it?" Tooth asked, stroking Jack's hair and biting her lip, concerned.

"No!" Jack sobbed.

"WELL THINK AGAIN JACK, **THINK AGAIN!**" she screeched. There was a loud BANG! And Toothiana was gone. In her place stood a large, fat turkey.

"**NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!**"


End file.
